Netflix Reviews You Can Use: Crackling Fireplace Video

Thanks, Arlene!

George Ford has done it again! A cinematic masterpiece that can not be missed! Five stars.

The ending will shock you to your core ! Warning this could offend others so brace yourself for the movie of a life time . You will cry and cheer !!

This is a great movie. I especially love the part at around 55:57 where the log on the right shifts slightly.

Sadly this is the edited US version with all swearing and nudity removed, and not the full 90 minute DVD release available in European and Asian territories. Anyone looking for the full experience will have to go elsewhere.

I liked this video much better than “This is a Test of the Emergency Broadcast System”, and almost as much as “Test Pattern at 3AM”.

This adaptation was okay, but not as good as the 1959 original. I’m not sure whose idea it was to replace Audrey Hepburn with Samuel L. Jackson, but that may have been one of the more brilliant casting choices of this film.

The book was better.

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Fireplace for your Home presents Crackling Fireplace

Fireplace for your Home presents Crackling Fireplace with Music

Fireplace for your Home Christmas Music edition

Fireplace for your Home Romance Edition

Evening Crackling Campfire with Music – presented by Fireplace for your Home

Amazon Reviews You Can Use

8 Impressively Sarcastic Amazon Product Reviews (Part 3) |

 This review is from: Officially Licensed Star Wars Luke Skywalker Ceremonial Jacket with Medal Of Yavin (M) (Toy)

I used to be an unemployed movie theater usher, but that all changed when I bought this jacket. Now I’m an unemployed movie theater usher with one of these jackets.

Accoutrements Horse Head Mask

And I’ve kind of had it up to here with Sarah Jessica Parker jokes. We get it. It’s funny that a horse is cast in human roles in a variety of television shows and movies, and it’s funny that they write it so that all the other characters talk to it like it’s a human. I just don’t get what’s so funny about repeating the same joke the show is making. It’s like expecting laughs when you point out that Mr. Ed is a horse. Duh. That’s the point of the show.

Amazon Reviews You Can Use: Wenger Giant Swiss Army Knife

Wenger Giant Swiss Amry Knife

Amazon Reviews for Wenger 16999 Giant Swiss Army Knife:

By MechYeti
Found this stuck into a stone while on vacation. I’m impressed with it, generally. Unfortunately, it turns out that removing it made me the new king of Switzerland, which is a lot of responsibility.

By Macgyver
I still haven’t figured out how to use the fork and knife at the same time. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

By rosmp
I am not sure what they were thinking, but I may as well schlepp my Klingon dictionary with me, because the built in translator produces nothing but gibberish (nuqDaq ‘oH puchpa”e’ actually came out as ‘your mother is bald and has gonads’ (should be `where is the bathroom’)).

By SteveB
This is an excellent tool, but you need to be aware that the time jump utility (tool #713, first control panel on the right when leaving the French restaurant on level 3 through the rear exit) is somewhat limited. I spoke with the telephone support, and they told me that recent models are unable to travel back in time past their manufacturing date.

By Fraggle
I only got this 5 days ago and I’m already pregnant and due for birth next Thursday! Wenger guarantees a child’s IQ of 150+.

PreviouslyAmazon Reviews You Can Use: Fresh Whole Rabbit

Amazon Reviews You Can Use: Bizarro Comics


By Bob S. (New York, United States)
This am bad book. It am full of stories about Bizarro World, home of Bizarro, the handsome duplicate of Superman. Every story start with Bizarro Code: “Us do opposite of all earthly things! Us hate beauty! Us love ugliness! Is big crime to make anything perfect on Bizarro World!” Me cry every time me read this book. Me hate it so much, me give it to all my friends. Since book is so bad, you should buy lots of copies.

By Heath Hanlin (North Syracuse, NY USA)
This book am so awful. Sometime me read and feel very mad at universe. Me read to me 4 year old son. Most comics am not violent enough for he. This am ’cause made long time ago when comics having more blood. Now we talk bizarro all over house. Make us sad sad sad.

PreviouslyAmazon Reviews You Can Use: Fresh Whole Rabbit

Amazon Reviews You Can Use: Fresh Whole Rabbit

Amazon – Fresh Whole Rabbit:

By P. Breakfield IV “Tom” (Greenville, SC United States)
I’ll keep this short and sweet. We ordered one of these rabbits for our children this Easter and boy what a surprise. It is NOT a living rabbit. Someone has killed this rabbit and skinned it, I suppose for eating. Anyway, our children were traumatized and Easter is not the same holiday that it used to be for us. On the upside, we don’t have to fill their Easter baskets anymore as we told them the Easter bunny was killed by Amazon.

P.S. The rabbit tasted very good.

By Brad Ramirez (Denver, CO)
This goes great with the pelt, whiskers, and bunny eyeballs that I purchased on eBay. Now I have a whole rabbit! Thanks!

By V. Zhirinovsky “Vlad the Mad” (Virginia, USA)
I am Director of Unholy Sacrifices for a prominent pagan bloodcult. Since our traditional sacrifical practices have been banned in 189 countries and the moon, we are now allowed only to use animal carcasses purchased on the internet. Let me warn you, Baal-Hammon will NOT be appeased by this offering. The Dark One will only accept sacrifices of mammals larger than a badger.

By Bill “Bill” (Maryville, TN USA)
While I’m sure the rabbit tastes fine, I have to wonder… why does the part where Amazon shows what people who bought this item also bought display four enema devices and one teeny tiny thong? I’m kind of horrified.

By Elvis_Nixon (Oil Trough, Arkansas)
How many weekends have I spent, in the loincloth, knife clenched in my teeth, running through the fields trying to find a rabbit? (A bunch, trust me on this, a bunch.) All so I can have something to sacrifice on the altar once I get to the cave.

Now, with this, home, fix a cocktail, go through the day’s mail, finish my drink and drive over to the cave, yank this carcass out of the box and offer this at the feet of my dark lord and master, boom, done. I’m happy, my dark lord and master is happy, everybody wins.

Bonus! Zubaz Pants

Hat tip to Ann Althouse.

Amazon reviews you can use

Collegehumor.come piece prompts hundreds of tongue-in-cheek Amazon reviews of cheesy t-shirt. Via Ace of Spades:”Anyway, this has become a craze, and the t-shirt is now selling 100 per hour, with the small t-shirt company attempting to crank out 30,000 a day. (Note: I have no idea how 100 per hour becomes 30,000 per day, either. But that’s what the ABC article says. Take it up with the wolves.)”

FWIW, I don’t think the reviews are all that funny on this one, but the t-shirt company has to be thrilled with the orders.

PreviouslyAmazon reviews you can use

Amazon reviews you can use

Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz

“Has anyone else tried pouring this stuff over dry cereal? A-W-E-S-O-M-E!”

“Horrible service, I bought my milk and went with the 7-9 day super saver shipping method and it arrived warm and curdled. What the hell?”

“I was considering buying used milk from a trusted Amazon reseller but decided against it. So you’ll notice the condition of MY milk was “New.” I deserve this luxury.”

“Why go to my local store and pay $2.99 for a galon of milk when I can have it overnight delivered for 10 times that price? I think I’ll get three gallons next time. As a current Pentagon employee, this makes perfect sense to me.”

“Don’t get fooled by the easy-to-use look of this product.”

“This product copiously leaks out of my nose whenever I read these reviews.”

Customer images.