Amazon Reviews You Can Use

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Amazon Reviews You Can Use

How to Avoid Huge Ships:

This book really is one of the best huge ship avoidance references I’ve come across, not just for the effective methods it teaches as to avoiding huge ships, but also for exploding some of the huge ship avoidance myths that many of us take for granted.

For example:
– Do not charge the huge ship at full speed in an attempt to scare it off. This may work with coyotes, but it is less effective with huge ships.
– Similarly, do not roll your boat over and play dead. Unless the huge ship is captained by a grizzly bear, this will not work.
– Do not attempt to go under the huge ship. This is typically not successful.
– Do not attempt to jump over the huge ship.

I’m a little annoyed with the sarcastic “reviewers” of this book. You all seem to think it’s funny that some people would honestly like some expert advice on ways to avoid huge ships. What, you’ve never been traveling at a very, very slow speed straight toward something really, really big that you could see for miles and miles away, and wished you’d known what steps you could take to avoid crashing into it? Well, all I can say is “congratulations!” What’s it like to be so perfect? You haters just keep on enjoying your huge-ship-collision-free little fantasies. I for one am going to buy this book and learn something, because I live in the real world, where huge ships and the dangers they present to people like me are actually a serious issue.

The 2009-2014 Outlook for Wood Toilet Seats in Greater China:

This is so weird. My husband and I were just discussing the 2009-2014 outlook for wood toilet seats in greater China the other day. Now today, here I am surfing Amazon and wouldn’t you know it? The 2009-2014 outlook for wood toilet seats in greater China. I am so happy the price seems reasonable. I’m thinking Amazing Anniversary Present!!!!!!

I was thinking, “Sweet! Finally a version of Outlook that will run on my wooden Chinese toilet seats!!” Little did I know this has **NOTHING** to do with Outlook for Windows or any other MicroSoft product. It is NOT a five-year wooden-toilet email/calendar software product, but is in fact some kind of WELL-DONE REPORT ON TOILET SEATS!! By coincidence still entirely useful to me in my line of business but now I will have to find some other way to coordinate my inter-seat schedules and emails!! Buyer beware!!

Amazon Reviews You Can Use: Elizabeth Warren’s “Pow Wow Chow”

So, yeah, little controversy over Elizabeth Warren’s claims to be Native American. And now it turns out she plagiarized her contributions to a book of Native American recipes:

The recipes from “Elizabeth Warren – Cherokee” include a crab dish with tomato mayonnaise. Mrs. Warren’s fictional Cherokee ancestors in Oklahoma were renowned for their ability to spear the fast-moving Oklahoma crab. It’s in the state song: “Ooooooklahoma! Where the crabs come sweepin’ down the plain.” But then the white man came, and now the Oklahoma crab is extinct, and at the Cherokee clambakes they have to make do with Mrs. Warren’s traditional Five Tribes recipe for Cherokee Lime Pie.

But the question we all want to know is, are the recipes any good? So let’s turn now to  the Amazon reviews of Pow Wow Chow: A Collection of Recipes from Families of the Five Civilized Tribes : Cherokee, Chickasaw, Choctaw, Creek and Seminole

By John Courtade (Austin, Texas United States) – See all my reviews

I’ve received nothing but rave reviews from my colleagues after whipping up treats from this cookbook in the faculty lounge kitchen. Admirers of Pow Wow Chow may also enjoy Bow Wow Chow, a Indonesian-influenced cookbook from a former professor now in politics.

By Mark W. Rodgers (Clarksville, MD, US) – See all my reviews

I’m confused; each recipe calls for 0/32 measurements of ingredients — that doesn’t add up to anything. I have serious reservations about these recipes.

By Jason K. Smith (Denver, CO United States) – See all my reviews

This is a fabulous collection of recipes suitable for faculty luncheons, or just anyone who is interested in getting in touch with their high-cheeked ancestors.

I felt, while making the crab with tomato mayonnaise dressing, that I was really in touch with my 0/32 Cherokee roots, and knew that my faux-native american ancestors were once putting this on canapes before inviting some new friends from the new world over for brunch!

I thoroughly enjoy the recipes here. My favorite one is called “Diversity Dish.” This was contributed by the world’s only confirmed blond-haired, blue-eyed Cherokee who used her tomahawk to dig this up from her Oklahoma archives. You start out with 10 quarts of sanctimony, add in a gallon of hypocrisy, throw in a few fables (I recommend the “Family Lore” brand available in Cambridge), add a pinch of whining (1/32 ounce will work), toss in a paleface poseur and a large measure of insufferability. No integrity required. And there you have it: political career implosion. Great for faculty lounge gatherings and unearned academic advancement.

5.0 out of 5 stars Wonderful Collection of Recipes for us American Indians,May 17, 2012

Recently I became a full blooded American Indian after watching the movies “Last of the Mohicans” and “Dances with Wolves.” Indians like me and Lizzie Warren can now share in the wonderful but often harsh world of the Native American. I am brought to tears when I hear how she struggles to live in her million $ Cambridge wigwam. How the white man keeps her in poverty on the Massachusetts Indian reservation called Harvard where they only give her $340,000 per year to live… Sitting Bull weeps to hear such cruelty.

If there is anything I can do as a fellow Indian to help her in her struggles against the evil pale face, please let Sacagawea Warren know I’m here for her…maybe we can meet and talk about our plight at a luncheon or something.

Stay strong Fauxcahontas…stay strong.

5.0 out of 5 stars Imported Mustard and Cognac,May 18, 2012

I must write my High School and complain about my history classes. Never did I realize that The indians had access to imported mustard and cognac. Elizabeth Warren’s fabulous recipes call for those ingredients and I am certain she would never make up a false recipe or copy any one else after all she is a liberal from Mass. Those poor folks from the former Pavillion Restaurant must have copied her great great great uncle from the fugawe tribe. Unfortunately they have been lost in the forests of Brookline but if you listen carefully at night you can hear them calling out wer’e the fugawe.